Tag Archives: funny

Stupid Twiki Shit

What do Godzilla, Buck Rogers and Twiki, Gloria Estefan, Prince, and the word “Booty” have in common?

This video above is the answer.

This is a song made after a Phillies NLCS game, late night, and drunk.

Concept was by Mike Ortiz. We pressed the buttons, I made the video, and made this miraculous concept a reality.

Things used:

Ableton 9 (too cheap to upgrade it) for the music.
Arturia Keystep 37 (to play godzilla noises).
Novation Launchpad Pro (to trigger the samples).
PowerPoint to make the video.

In summary, “Bidi bidi bidi, booty booty booty, B-b-b-b-buck!”

5 Mystic Eggs

Bob and I did a track with samples from Diamond & Silk. The reference source for this is a monologue they had about how “Socialist Cubans only get 5 eggs a month.”

This was too funny so we made a song.

Diamond and Silk
Diamond & Silk

Bitchin Bob’s birthday gift was used for this. He got a groovy drum pad. It’s a Kat Percussion KTMP1 Electronic Drum and Percussion Pad Sound Module. We were breaking it in and came up with this track. The timing is off and its very sloppy but MAN did we have fun and laugh while making it.

Bob's New Drum thingy
Bob’s new drum pad thingy.
5 Mystic Eggs

Click the play thingy and give it a listen. The orchestra hit at the very beginning was left in intentionally. It was triggered by Bob on the drum pad.

Also used:

  • Korg Volca Bass, Keys, & Drums
  • MicroKorg
  • Korg Kaossilator
  • Korg MiniKP (red box)
  • Zoom MS-70CDR Effects pedal (on the Volca’s)
  • Korg Minilogue XD

Hozpitality-Beachweek

The latest hit from Hozpitality.  Torn from the pages of the current headlines…

“The haunting vocals are superb. Reminiscent of Tore My Anus.”
-Nguyen Chaney

 


Guest Parking (with CHOB)

Nice parking, man!!!

Here’s a song for something we all know.  It’s a  song about parking, traffic, and driving.  Bob doesn’t know what an Oxford comma is but he will learn someday.  Maybe after 10 minutes of listening to Guest Parking?  Maybe you can learn something toe?

Hope you like it.  Use headphones!

NEW!Completely jive and pointless lyrics below!NEW!

Now the next step is picking a spot for parking
So lets pick a spot first
Lets say we want to park here
So whatever spot you pick for parking
You want to count that spot as number
ONE.
Then you drive forward to the next spot
And count that spot as number
TWO.
Then you drive up one more spot
And count that spot as number
THREE.
Don’t worry I’m not gonna take you back to kindergarten
And make you count up to
HUNDRED.
Fa fa fa fa…
After printing this parking permit
please make sure it is displayed
in the front dashboard
of your guest vehicle.
All guest parking is
located on the 4th floor
marked with “visitor”.
Guests that park in any other spaces
may be towed.
If you need to make changes to
your reservation or
you have any questions
please contact ussssss.
Parking is at your own
risk.
Management is not
responsible
For theft or damage to
vehicle.
Valid for 24 hours
only.
All guest parking is located
on the 4th floor
and marked with “visitor.”
Guests that park in any other spaces
may be
towed.
May be
towed.
For now we’ll stop
HERE.

Selfish Political Optics (I Don’t Apologize For It)

A new hit! Guest starring (or like the hip hop people say “feat.”) Chris Christie and drums by Rush’s Neil Peart!

You gotta love a hated politician that doesn’t give a shit about his constituents.  And the funny part is, people are RAGING about him lately, but, if you aren’t completely politically myopic, you could see this in his behavior since he was first elected.  I guess the republicans in New Jersey are completely idiotic, until crap like this is brazenly shoved down their throat in the media.

Either way, this song is HERE TO HELP YOU UNDERSTAND the man and the SELFISH EGO that is Chris Christie.  Let us all hope after this, he just GOES AWAY!!!

Created this with:

  • Korg Volca bass
  • Korg Volca Keys
  • Korg MiniKP(red box)
  • Korg MicroKorg
  • Ableton Live
  • Adobe Audition
  • Audacity
  • Novation Launchpad
  • A sampled drum fill from Rush’s track “Red Lenses” (from the “Grace Under Pressure” album)

This took about 4 hours to do.  This was tons of fun.  Listen in headphones “cause they’re really gonna help you on this one…”

Big Deal !!! Who Cares !!!

Hozpitality – EpiPen

EpiPen and Peanut at candle light dinner

Mike O’meara Show – Nitrous Oxide Poops

This was in the “News You May Not Need” section of The Mike O’Meara Show on May 25, 2016. I hope it’s OK to post a clip like this but I just had to because I spit up my soda at the end.

I’ve been listening and subscribing to this show for years and I’m going to start plugging it more with my own clips here since I don’t use bookface.

Go to their site and smarten up!  Ya Shart!

New $20 Ideas

Here are some fresh “inclusive” ideas for the screwing over of Andrew Jackson and our history. Vote for one below.

20 snoop
Spend a Twizzle my Nizzle

JJ 20
This 20 is DYNO-MIYEEET!

20 george jefferson
WEEZY!! Who spendin my 20?!?

20 marion barry
20 dolla will keep it weel for Ward 8! That bitch set him up!

Which should be the new $20

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

BREAKING NEWS:

Candidates considered as an afterthought:

  1. Rerun from Whats Happening
  2. Shirley Q. Liquor
  3. The complex and multitalented Miss Latoya Jackson.
  4. The “Aint nobody got time for that! I got bronchitis” lady.
  5. Nell Carter
  6. Oprah

If you can think of anymore, leave them in the comments.  I may get to them and start a whole new round of polling.  I could make a whole separate poll for the ladies.  We could nearly consider this to be the “primary”.

Frank Gallagher (from Shameless) Gets It!

Frank Gallagher, from the Showtime TV show Shameless, describes the end of Racial and Religious differences.  The character can actually see into the future!  Although I think he is more current than most ignorant people realize.

frankgallagher1