Apartment Living in The DC Metro Area Part 1

 

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I sent this email to building management this morning:

SUBJECT: Hallway etiquette, or How can we say this nicely?

Since I have been living here at Avalon at Grosvenor Station, I have noticed some behavior in the hallways that seems to be acceptable and I do not understand how this is reasonable:

1. Every weekday morning (6:50am) and evening (4:30pm) it is apparently ok to let your kids run screaming, yelling, chanting or stomping as loudly as possible in the hallways. This is similar to releasing your hyper children into a McDonalds play place. So apparently the halls of Avalon Grosvenor are a place to allow your kids to have a discipline free LOUD wild run in the hallway EVERY WORKDAY.

2. Apparently if the weather is not the best, it is okay to turn the hallway into an exercise yard for your dogs. I guess its okay (and even comical) to let them run up and down the hallway with no leash at top speed chasing each other like it’s a grey hound track.

I had no idea that this was accepted as common courtesy in a shared apartment complex hallway.

Next time, if I come home drunk early in the morning or at any odd hour, I’ll be sure to hire a brass band to march down the hallway and play loudly OR I will allow my cat to use the hallway as a litter box.

I realize that this negligence of others is accepted behavior in Montgomery county and the DC metro area (as I had the unfortunate pleasure of living in this area before and I realize coming back here is not a step up in quality of life). I have grown to consider that, in this area, one cannot expect other people (especially strangers) to be considerate of others. If that was the case, the traffic around here wouldn’t suck so bad.

Do you think I’m out of line by expecting anything different for a common use hallway?

 UPDATE 11:32 AM SAME DAY!

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UPDATE 11:54 AM SAME DAY!

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Now I guess I should just wait for the flaming bags of poop and dirty diapers in front of my door.  We’ll keep you updated!

UPDATE 11:57AM SAME DAY!

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Yeah!  Go!  Go!  Go!

Hall of The Titan Mountain Thing

Slot Machine Noise Malfunction + Effects = Curiousity

I was playing my stupid Jackpot Party Casino game on my phone. I was winning big.  When you win big in a slot machine, the music plays a repetitive arpeggio or loop while it totals (or dramatically counts up) your winnings.   For some reason when I won on this slot machine, the “count your money up” loop got stuck on my phone.

Before the app crashed, I plugged my phone into the Korg Kaoss Pad (aka the red box) and tortured the loop with effects.

Put this in your headphones and check it out! Play it loud! Try to identify all the different effects going on. Half the time, its not even altering an audio source. The red box snatches up a sample and lets you torture it in mid-air. It’s TOO POWERFUL!!! 🙂

Knob Twiddler of The Year: Daniel Lanois

For those who don’t know who Daniel Lanois is, let’s just say he produced and made U2 famous, worked a ton with Brian Eno, produced stuff for Bob Dylan, and host of other artists that really have nothing in common with each other.  This guy goes on CeMeGo’s top 10 music producers list (up there with people such as Brian Eno, Trevor Horn, Todd Rundgren, etc).  With his latest album, he decided to play the studio like an instrument.  Obviously this needs a very good rhythm section, which he definitely has here.  The sounds he is generating are pre recorded and some are sampled in the moment (from the drum or the bass) and then everything is oscillated manipulated and extrapolated.  🙂   This, of course, is right up my alley.

As always, crank it!

This Guy Should Get a Medal for Service to His Country!

… and the smug do goodery comments of the law enforcement in this article, are so transparent and full of PR bullshit, it makes me want to puke!

This boy is a patriot! Give him a medal NOW!

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Click for story

He paid restitution to “Xerox State and Local Solutions”.  At least we know our tax sucking corporations wont skip a beat on their crock shit loads of cash flow!

EVIL EVIL EVIL!  Shame on america!

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