Category Archives: silly

Stupid Twiki Shit

What do Godzilla, Buck Rogers and Twiki, Gloria Estefan, Prince, and the word “Booty” have in common?

This video above is the answer.

This is a song made after a Phillies NLCS game, late night, and drunk.

Concept was by Mike Ortiz. We pressed the buttons, I made the video, and made this miraculous concept a reality.

Things used:

Ableton 9 (too cheap to upgrade it) for the music.
Arturia Keystep 37 (to play godzilla noises).
Novation Launchpad Pro (to trigger the samples).
PowerPoint to make the video.

In summary, “Bidi bidi bidi, booty booty booty, B-b-b-b-buck!”

How To NOT Be Musical

Yamaha Reface CS

So I purchased a Yamaha Reface CS because:

  1. It was cheap on craigslist
  2. I always loved the Yamaha CS80
  3. There is no menu just sliders so its easy to torture sound

I brought it home and immediately plugged it in and hit record and just started blowing my mind.

AND NOW because you are lucky enough to BE THERE WITH ME (thank you Internet), you can hear 38 minutes of me messing with it.

Nothing sane, professional, or musical at all. Just making funny noises and pushing it around.

I am a sucker for Reverb, Delay, Sustain, and Pad sounds. This punches all those tickets… BIG TIME! I am quite happy.

Yamaha CS First Time Brain Explosion

OK I CONFESS! I like spending money just to press buttons that make funny noises. I ask so little from life.

5 Mystic Eggs

Bob and I did a track with samples from Diamond & Silk. The reference source for this is a monologue they had about how “Socialist Cubans only get 5 eggs a month.”

This was too funny so we made a song.

Diamond and Silk
Diamond & Silk

Bitchin Bob’s birthday gift was used for this. He got a groovy drum pad. It’s a Kat Percussion KTMP1 Electronic Drum and Percussion Pad Sound Module. We were breaking it in and came up with this track. The timing is off and its very sloppy but MAN did we have fun and laugh while making it.

Bob's New Drum thingy
Bob’s new drum pad thingy.
5 Mystic Eggs

Click the play thingy and give it a listen. The orchestra hit at the very beginning was left in intentionally. It was triggered by Bob on the drum pad.

Also used:

  • Korg Volca Bass, Keys, & Drums
  • MicroKorg
  • Korg Kaossilator
  • Korg MiniKP (red box)
  • Zoom MS-70CDR Effects pedal (on the Volca’s)
  • Korg Minilogue XD

The Lowering Of The Table

Today I lowered the keyboard stand to match the height of the surrounding desks. This meant unhooking stuff and rehooking it which means ANOTHER TESTER TRACK TO MAKE SURE EVERYTHING RECORDED. (Which also means, it was a scratch track, so dont think for a minute this is supposed to sound “good” or be “official”).

The Lowering of the Table Tester File

And now I can SIT at the keyboard stand instead of STAND at it. Thank you quarantine.

Used Microkorg, Volca Bass, and Kaossilator Pro.

Ninth Release from Hozpitality! Beach Week

Hozpitality - Beach Week

Wow! So much time has passed since the 2015 release Hozpitality-To Go. There has been a lot of moving around and acquisition of new noise making devices and volunteering of new noise making people.

As you know, Hozpitality is a collective. Anyone who wants to make sound and record may do so. Since moving the “Hozpitality Home Studio” around a lot, more people have come on board. They will be listed in the Personnel List below.

Track List:

  1. Beach Week (4:16)
    This was a drum pattern recorded by Bush, keys by CeMeGo, and vocals by Gloria Snatch (now known as Eriyyka BaDont). Please do not miss the Beach Week video (which is the first music video for a Hozpitality song). The lyrics/vocals for the song were created after watching Brett Kavanaugh hearings. He still likes beer. Yeah well so do we all, but we don’t get to be a life long supreme court justice (you dick).
  2. D and C Drone for DC (5:43)
    This was extracted from a long jam session (May 2019) between Derek and CeMeGo. Derek plays bass. Not sure about the drums. Keys and noise by CeMeGo. Probably first recorded use of Korg Minilogue XD (closer to the end).
  3. Don’t Know What To Say (3:45)
    Bitchin’ Bob souls up a hit. Drums and 2 chord melody by Bush. Extra keys and augmentation by CeMeGo. This is a touching song, about hats, impaired vision, and lots of grumbled Joe Cocker styled wailing.
  4. Exceptional (5:33)
    A jam session created in April of 2017, chopped up, and repositioned by Bitchin’ Bob and CeMeGo. The Novation Launchpad was heavily abused for the drum pattern.
  5. Epipen (2:33)
    A lounge statement calling out Big Pharma. The skyrocketing price of Epipens used to ward off an allergic reaction causes us to do a timely lounge piece. Gloria Snatch on vocals and Randy Glands on keys.
  6. Guest Parking (with CHOB) (10:02)
    The voice sample is audio from an instructional video explaining how to park your car in a parking lot and remember where you parked (very ridiculous). There is also a dramatic reading of the guest parking rules for a certain overpriced apartment community in North Bethesda, MD.
  7. The Tootsie Throwdown (4:34)
    Derek plays bass and croons about Tootsie (the cat). What else do we know? Right?
  8. High Mystic Water Rhythms (5:27)
    This is not the first time CeMeGo has stolen drum sounds from the band Rush. This is a mash up of drum samples from Rush songs “High Water” and “Mystic Rhythms”. This was one of the first experiments with the Novation Launchpad.
  9. Staying Up Late To Make Some Beats Tonight (But You’re Not Alone) (4:10)
    Instruments, vocoder, and junk by CeMeGo. Yet another stolen traffic report sample from WTOP radio.
  10. Exceptional (Bangin Remix) (4:35)
    The heavy rocking mid section of the track Exceptional had us dancing around so hard, we had to jam on it. This is what happened.

Personnel:

Bitchin Bob: Words, Crooning, Synth, Percussion, Drums, Ideas
Bush: Drums and chord ideas
CeMeGo (Randy Glands): Vocoder, Synth, Keys, Bass Gtr, Drums, Audio Shenanigans
Derek: Bass Gtr, Voice, Drums
MsNeeBo (Eriyyka BaDont, Gloria Snatch): Vocals, Lyrics, Insane Laughter
Tootsie: Throwdown.

Tools used:
Ableton Live 9 Suite (too cheap to upgrade to 10!)
A bunch of free .VST files from the Internet
Adobe Audition (too useful unfortunately!)
Fender Aerodyne Bass
Korg Electribe Sampler 2
Korg Kaossilator Pro
Korg Mini-KP (red box)
Korg MicroKorg (lots of stuff and vocoder)
Korg Minilogue XD (still new).
Korg Volca(s) (Bass, Beats, and Keys)
Novation Launchpad

Click here to download the album in a zip file with cover art (48megs).

As always, we aren’t getting rich on this, so comments and opinions of this are welcomed/encouraged on this blog.

Hozpitality thanks you and wishes you a Happy Beach Week.

Hozpitality-Beachweek

The latest hit from Hozpitality.  Torn from the pages of the current headlines…

“The haunting vocals are superb. Reminiscent of Tore My Anus.”
-Nguyen Chaney

 


Selfish Political Optics (I Don’t Apologize For It)

A new hit! Guest starring (or like the hip hop people say “feat.”) Chris Christie and drums by Rush’s Neil Peart!

You gotta love a hated politician that doesn’t give a shit about his constituents.  And the funny part is, people are RAGING about him lately, but, if you aren’t completely politically myopic, you could see this in his behavior since he was first elected.  I guess the republicans in New Jersey are completely idiotic, until crap like this is brazenly shoved down their throat in the media.

Either way, this song is HERE TO HELP YOU UNDERSTAND the man and the SELFISH EGO that is Chris Christie.  Let us all hope after this, he just GOES AWAY!!!

Created this with:

  • Korg Volca bass
  • Korg Volca Keys
  • Korg MiniKP(red box)
  • Korg MicroKorg
  • Ableton Live
  • Adobe Audition
  • Audacity
  • Novation Launchpad
  • A sampled drum fill from Rush’s track “Red Lenses” (from the “Grace Under Pressure” album)

This took about 4 hours to do.  This was tons of fun.  Listen in headphones “cause they’re really gonna help you on this one…”

So How Is The Job Hunt Going?

A listing for a technical writer position came up in Rockville. SIX different “recruiters” called me for it.

  • All offering different lengths of contract.
  • Some showed a salary range and some didn’t.
  • Some of them called BEFORE sending a job description i.e., “cold called.”
  • 3 left a message.

This was the one that I could understand the most. This is an example of one of the “great” recruiters in “America” that are the “Warriors of My Future” who will save me from homelessness in this “great” nation. These are the people who control my future and destiny and stand between me and that all so important encompassing enthralling career move that will change my life and make things better for me.

Let’s just listen to the magic and hope for my future.

Think I have any hope? At all?

Do you have a clearer understanding of my “attitude”?

I get this at a rate between 6-12 interactions a day. I’ve had these and answered them and tried to work with them now for 7 months. Do you think these are actual jobs? Any thoughts at all about this would be interesting from anyone. I’ve already emailed 2 congressman about this with no responses.

All I can say is WHAT THE HELL?!?!

UPDATE: I just had a job description that asked if “Any time planned off next few months (Dr appointments, Vacations, etc.)? ”

I replied with “I may get sick. I am human. I do not “need” a vacation ever, but it may be difficult to come to work constantly with no time away. Once again, I am human.”

EXCEPTIONAL REMIX !!!


WHAT A MESS!!! Many people have said, to mix up the thing or things.

So they say, “OH NO! He’s mixing things up again!” Because, you know, thats what they say. And I mean that, believe me!

SAD!

But we DID mix it up anyways, because, ya know, I thought it was good and smart and talented and successful. Full of common sense. Strong, passionate, powerful, and with great verve. A TRUE PATRIOT !!